It was Valentine’s Day. I sometimes forget how beautiful Midtown is. Among the heighten concrete slabs, signs of life peek out from the bottom. Cute parks where a mother watches her toddler play during her lunch break. Tree lined streets which await the presence of spring greens. Small cafes that serve plate loads of organic cheese and seasonal fruits to couple sitting there, swapping bites and catching kisses.
It was a fig that I munched on as I waited for my nanny interview to show. It was the umpteenth interview I went on in the last few weeks, I applied for position I know I wasn’t qualified for but I used those meeting to observe other’s apartment décor and practice with coming up with saying positive things about myself. It was during these there I met some of the strangest yet most gorgeous women- Christine, who’s honesty scared me and I thanked her for wasting my time. There was Michaela, the Italian and the most beautiful woman I ever met in my life. She was the mother of a Korean infant; we spoke for hours about out our parents’ divorces and finding true love in New York City (I was surprised how honestly I was with her about the intimate details in my life). There was Molly, who I wondered why God gave her a uterus at all. Moms with high tech toys and sparkling wedding rings. Marriages. Relationships. Falling in love.
Valentine’s Day. The day where lovers worshiped each other. Usually today would make me sick with envy, staring at the red and pink things all around and in the air. But right at this moment, I felt a certain sense of calm and respect for myself. One have might have called this feeling love. I felt alright at this moment. I decided this day isn’t meant for lovers of lovers. It is meant for lovers of things. And I was a lover of life. Of the adventures I had. Of all the times I got lost. Of all the times I put a new song on my iPod. Of all the times I cried until the salt crystals fell from my eyes. Of all the times I laughed until I wanted to vomit. Of the people I met, friends and crazy souls. Of a deepened appreciation for my own heart and bravery. It was a day of great loves.
I put my pen down when I heard my name called and took a deep breath in.